Posts in category: Personal

Anyone else feel like they’re almost on a countdown already to the end of the school year?

The first week back after half term flew by and it feels like it’ll be the summer holidays before we know it.  And I have quite mixed feelings about it.  Part of me is looking forward to the long holidays, the change of pace, the break from routine and getting to spend loads of time with the children.

The other part of me is quite sad for what the end of this school year means.

It means the end of afternoons with my little girl.  She’ll be in school all day come September, and it really feels like the end of era.  She’ll be ready for it, I’m sure, but I think it’ll take me a bit of time to feel ok about it.  Starting full time school feels like the first step in letting them go, and that’s just so bittersweet.

I still have time though. 

These last precious weeks of term, when it’s just me and her every afternoon.  I want to slow down and soak it all up and set it firmly in my memory, these days when she’s still little and still mine.

We went to the beach again this weekend, and she stripped off and had a whale of a time in the sea.

I stood back, watching, taking photographs.  Steve was the one with her, acting as her safe harbour.  To start with she stayed right by him, reaching for his hand to steady herself.  Then she started to get bolder, and slowly but surely moved that little bit further away, out into the water.

It felt quite symbolic to watch.  And quite wonderful too.

I hope I feel the same way watching her head into school on that first day in September.

Just don’t get me started yet on how I feel about Rhys moving into year 3, and the juniors, at the same time!

In 2017 we managed to get a family photo every month for the me and mine project, which I’m still really proud of.

It seems like it should be quite easy, to snap a quick family picture each month, but it’s something I’ve found strangely tricky at times.  One thing that really helped me complete the project last year was to relax the rules a little bit.  If I realise right at the end of a month that we’ve not taken a family photo yet, I don’t panic about it.

I’ve decided that I would rather ‘cheat’ and take a photo a few days into the next month than rush a photo on the last day, when no one is really in the mood and the lighting is rubbish and so on.

This is what I did for May this year.

We had a few opportunities to take family photos last week, with it being half term and Steve being off work.  But it just didn’t happen.  So our family photos for May ended up being taken at the beginning of June.

And I feel the same way about it that I did on the few occasions last year that this happened.  I’m really glad that we waited.

We could’ve taken our photos at the end of May.  But they would’ve been taken inside, on a grey gloomy day, when none of us were really in the mood to do it.

By cheating the system a little bit, and taking them a few days late, I have photos that I really love.

I actually took our tripod down to the beach with us, knowing that I wanted to get these family pictures and I’m so pleased that I did it.  I thought I would feel a bit self-conscious about it, but I really didn’t.

I don’t think anyone gave us a second glance to be honest.

And it was so much easier to get these photos than it would’ve been if I’d had to balance the camera on our backpack or something.  I’m not sure I want to start carrying the tripod around with me every time we go out somewhere, but it is something I’ll definitely do again on days I know I want to take a photo with all of us in somewhere like the beach where there’s not an easily available bench or wall to put the camera on.

Do you take family photos regularly?  How do you go about it; with a tripod or by balancing the camera wherever you possibly can?!

Half term finished on a lovely happy note for us, with glorious weather for spending a morning at the beach.

We knew it would be quite a warm day, so planned everything around the tide times so that we could all have a bit of a paddle in the sea.  You might not know this but we have one of the highest tidal ranges in the world at Swansea bay.

When the tide is out here it is really out, and it’s quite a trek to get down to the water if you want a paddle.  So, knowing this, we got down to the beach for 10am yesterday, when the tide was just starting to go out again.  Which meant that we all got to have a good splash around in the sea, and Rhys ended up with his shorts off, sitting and letting the gentle waves come in around him.

We actually bookended our whole week with trips to this beach.

On Monday we just walked along it though, to get to the Marina and up to the top of the Meridian tower for a drink in the Grape and Olive.  We’d mentioned to Rhys that we might go up there around the time of his birthday for a treat, but we just hadn’t had the chance until last week when Steve was off work.

The sky bar in the Grape and Olive really is right at the top of the tower and the views from up there are absolutely amazing.

We spent most of our time up there spotting various local landmarks while enjoying our drinks.  If you’re ever visiting Swansea it’s well worth a visit, even if you do what we did and just have a quick drink and check out the views.

The rest of our half term week was spent swimming at the National Pool and pottering around at home and in the garden.

It was pretty laid back which seems to be our style when it comes to the school holidays.  No big days out, no trips away, just time spent together.  I know I’ve said it before but we’re so lucky to live where we do, because we really don’t need to go away anywhere to get that holiday feeling.

With the beach so close, and whole of Gower right there, I’m pretty pleased I chose to call this place home.

I was wondering how to start this week’s post, and in my wondering I started thinking about the quote behind it:

“You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth”

I don’t really think I’d given it that much thought before, but it actually fits really nicely with the way I think about being a parent.

My mum has always told me that your children are only lent to you.  They’re not yours to keep forever, it’s your job as a parent to, ultimately, let them go.

It’s bittersweet, and sometimes I want to reject that idea completely and hold on as tight as I can to my children.  But I know she’s right.  And I’m reminded that I’m doing my job as a parent pretty well in this respect when I see how happily my children go out into the world these days.

My in-laws picked them up from school on Friday, and had them for a sleepover that night.  On the Friday afternoon Nerys and her Nana stopped by our house to pick up their overnight things, and rather than come in and see me Nerys decided she would rather wait in the car, seeing as it was raining out.

She waved to me and blew me kisses from the car, and was perfectly content with that.  And I just thought, how wonderful is that.  That she’s so happy with her grandparents.  I always feel that it’s a sign of my children having a secure attachment to me and their dad when they’re happy to be away from us.

Still, it was lovely when they came home the next day, full of hugs and stories.

Your children really are just lent to you.

So I will soak up all the moments and memories I can while they’re still here and still mine.  I will record these days of fairy wings and plaits and cheesy smiles.  And I will trust that when the time comes and they really do step out into the world on their own they’ll do so with confidence, secure in the knowledge that they are loved unconditionally.

The older Rhys gets, the more I wonder what’s going on inside his head a lot of the time.

I have a feeling he sees the world a little differently than I do, and I’m trying really hard to put myself in his shoes and understand where he’s coming from and how he feels about things.

He has been struggling a bit recently with things that don’t come easily to him.

If he can’t get something right on the first try he’s been getting really upset, frustrated and angry and doesn’t really want to try again.  So we’ve been talking a fair bit about developing a growth mindset, instead of this fixed mindset of ‘I just can’t do it’.

I’m hoping that, if we talk it through enough, it will start to sink in. 

And he’ll start to get his confidence back and realise that he can do all sorts of things that are hard at first, if he just perseveres and isn’t afraid to mess up a bit during the learning process.

All of this has made me realise how easily we as parents can mess up too though, even with the very best of intentions.

I’m so cautious of labels when it comes to our children.  I think that labelling a child as ‘lazy’, or ‘clumsy’ or ‘stupid’ can be so harmful and really impact the way they see themselves.  But I sometimes forget that labelling them ‘bright’ and ‘talented’ or other things like that can be just as bad.

There’s just so much to live up to, when you’re told you’re clever.

I’m not saying we shouldn’t ever say those things to our children, I’m just nervous of them ending up feeling like that label is who they are and who we expect them to be.

It’s just a bloody minefield isn’t it, this parenting thing.

Sometimes it can feel like you can’t do right for doing wrong.

I think all we can really do is keep checking in.

With our children and with ourselves.

And adjust our course as often as we need to, to try and get to that end goal of raising happy children.

It’s starting to feel like spring has well and truly arrived now.

I mean, I don’t want to curse it or anything, but we’ve had a decent amount of warm, sunny days in the last few weeks.  And it seems like everywhere you look flowers are in bloom.  Bluebells in particular, have you noticed that there seem to be bluebells all over the place this year?!

With the change in the season we’ve changed up our routine a bit and have started letting the children stay up a bit later at the weekends.  A few times now we’ve gone out for an evening walk and it’s been really lovely.

This is what we did last Sunday and the light in the park was just perfect for taking some photos of the children together.

I really love how Rhys and Nerys seem to naturally cuddle together now when I ask them if I can take photos of them together.

I’m sure there will come a time in the future when they won’t want to hug for photos, so I’ll make the most of these days while I can.  And I will take any chance I can get to capture them together, just as they are right now.

After a bit of a grey, chilly, drizzly week, last weekend came as a lovely sunny surprise.

We went to visit my sister and her family on Saturday, and spent most of the day out in their garden.  My parents were visiting too and it was wonderful to get to spend some time with them, and for the children to see them too.

Sunday morning we pottered about at home, then Rhys had his swimming lesson.

In the evening we decided to make the most of the sunshine and took the children out for a stroll to the local shops and home again via the park.

The evening light was just perfect for taking some photos.  I had been itching to take some of Nerys all day because I just absolutely loved the outfit she had picked out to wear all day!

This little one definitely knows her own mind when it comes to the clothes she wears.

My sister had a bag of clothes at her house that had been passed on from our brother’s girls, and we were sorting through them to see what would be good for Nerys and what would be good for her cousin who is a year older but about the same size.

I say ‘we’ were sorting through them, but I really had no input at all.  Nerys was quite happy making her own mind up about what things she liked and what things she didn’t.  Most of the things we took away with us were pink, and several bits were also frilly.

So today’s outfit consisted of a pink Hello Kitty top and pink, butterfly print leggings that she already had, and a fab pink tutu type skirt that she chose at the weekend.

Looks pretty cool to me!

And that hairstyle I can’t take any credit for, that was all the work of her daddy.