It’s honestly impressive how quickly the brain can go from just checking social media or LinkedIn (granted that’s also social media) for a minute to immediately feel insecure because it looks like everyone is thriving, like they’re all thriving except for you.
Maybe someone announced on LinkedIn that they’re making a career switch that somehow already has a job lined up, a promotion announcement, maybe on Instagram, a content creator you follow is sharing a small business they’re creating, or someone is sharing a professional photoshoot that clearly doesn’t look like an AI prompt.
But in your real life, well, just real-life things are happening, bills are due, work is busy, energy is limited, so when did success become a daily performance? And yes, by all means, here all of this feels horribly frustrating.
Like, it feels personal even though technically, none of this is. Online success is edited, curated, scheduled, filtered, sometimes literally and emotionally. It’s a highlight reel mixed with strategic positioning, and it’s very good at making normal progress feel invisible.
Remember that Online Success is Presentation
It should be so obvious at this point, but so many folks just forget this bit; most people are not showing the behind-the-scenes mess. They’re showing the best angle. You’re probably no different here either.
Like, one LinkedIn update about getting a new job isn’t sharing the hundreds of rejections and thousands of hours poured into applications.
Even academic wins, publications, grants, and acceptances are usually the result of a long process, not a random, magical moment.
These are just two examples, but very rarely do people share the losses; they just share the wins.
Presentation is Practically a Skill
Well, in general, nowadays everyone does need to present themselves; you do it in meetings by being well-groomed and dressed nicely, it’s not all that different online (and a good presentation creates more trust anyway).
For example, some people invest in professional headshots, like from Luke Chapman Photography, because good images make a person, well, their whole brand (especially if they’re trying to run a business) look way more established.
You can have a great headshot and still just try and figure things out, and it’s not being fake either. It’s just in the packaging, how you “package” yourself, and packaging can make progress look bigger than it feels day to day.
It’s Better to Compare Strategy
Well, specifically here, don’t compare the outcome, and yes, sometimes (a big fat sometimes), it’s okay to compare. Think of it like this: instead of comparing outcomes, like titles, follower counts, income, and degrees, compare strategies.
What are they doing consistently? What systems do they have? What are they prioritising? What are they saying no to?
Maybe it’s a content creator posting daily, might have a whole workflow behind it, same for a small business, they might have had to reinvent themselves to get where they are now, or someone who climbed the career ladder.
Maybe they networked their way up there. So maybe if you can figure out their process (and sometimes people will share this), then you can maybe borrow their process and implement it for yourself.
Disclosure: this is a collaborative post