I wrote a list the other day of my ten favourite rom-coms. These are films that I can quite happily watch over and over again.
They also live in a separate dvd rack in the bedroom, away from the rest of our collection. Why? Because these are films that Steve really doesn’t want to watch.
They’re films that I put on to watch when I go to bed early; comfort films to fall asleep to.
If we’re going to watch a film together we’ll normally choose an action film or a comedy. If we tried to watch a romantic comedy together I’m not sure how long we’d last before I turned it off simply to stop Steve mocking and insulting it!
So, this research from the University of Rochester might not be that helpful to us. But it might be of interest to some of you couples out there that can both tolerate rom-coms.
The researchers were looking at what might help bring down divorce rates in the early stages of marriage, and found that divorce rates were cut in half for couples who watched romantic films together and talked about them afterwards.
That sounds like a pretty impressive statistic to me!
The study looked at couples in their first 3 years of marriage and found that watching a film every week that has a romantic relationship as a main part of the plot and discussing it afterwards was as effective at preventing divorce as other, more intensive relationship therapies.
The key seems to be the discussion afterwards, where the newly-weds would answer specific questions about the couple in the film and how they dealt with various issues. They were encouraged to discuss if they dealt with things the same way as the film couple.
I think the main thing to take away from this is the importance of talking openly and honestly about our relationships, and to acknowledge how we might sometimes handle things the wrong way and work to resolve issues in a healthier way. My husband and I are generally quite good at talking things through, and we’ve been married longer than the 3 years that were studied, so I think I might be able to let him off the hook with this one!
And, who knows, if we ever feel like we’re not communicating as well as we should maybe the threat of having to watch something with Keira Knightley or Reese Witherspoon in it might be enough to get him to open up!